He’d ridden home on the back of the SpyderCycle, alternately fuming quietly with the occasional angry outburst to his brother about their failure. It didn’t take them long with Bryce’s suicidal speed, to drive along the cost of California until they reached Tempest Point.
Everyone made noises about a post-mortem session with food but he knew himself well enough to know his anger and frustration would not provide useful discussion with his friends, so he stalked through the bar grabbing a bottle of Bushmill’s, before walking quickly through the halls to the door that led to room where he slammed his hand down onto the release.
He stomped through the entry where he froze, like every other time the last few days, at the sight of her clothes strewn across the floor and bed. She was a magnificent slob, yet another example of contrast between them. Yet, he couldn’t bring himself to pick anything up in the days since their return. Hell, he could barely stand to be in this room that they shared for almost two years now, and it felt as if the room was dying as he watched, and he breathed deep, tasting the scents? Were they dimmer since this morning?
After a few minutes, he shook himself, drinking down a quarter of the whiskey in attempt to wipe away his depression, and began stripping off the clothing, throwing it into the hamper by the closet before laying his uniform on the strange device that William and Apex had created to mend and clean their armored skinsuits. Even in his anger, old habits died hard.
He walked nude into the massive bathroom, maybe their favorite part of the suite he had built them, before slapping the shower on high heat. He walked back over to the closest sink, grabbing a handful of pills from a couple of the bottles, swallowing them down with a couple more slugs of the whiskey. Not like it’s difficult to confiscate such supplies from various criminals around the world.
He climbed into the steaming shower and for a blessed five minutes let the drugs and alcohol wash away his rage.
After the few minutes of the blessed steam and mood alterations, he used the shower for its intended purpose, including shaving off the five days of stubble that he’d been avoiding, before dressing in jeans and a t-shirt of some band he had never heard of and walked out the door.
When he walked into the medical bay, Whitley was just getting ready to depart and by her expression he could tell there had been no change so he handed her a glass in greeting and didn’t even try to ask for anything new, just walking on by and collapsing into the chair to sit and watch the love of his life dying Oh, Whitley said she wasn’t, the monitors said she wasn’t, but his senses told another story. Something was happening, and he’d sat through watching Shawna in a coma before, Bryce, Henri, hell, half the team before. They’d all changed in someway. And the question remained as to what would be left when she came back to him this time, if she came back.
He finished the bottle before climbing into bed with her and gently lifting her body and cradling her against his for the rest of the night.
As the first hint of dawn began to brighten the dark blue of the sea at night, he gently lifted her again before sliding out of the medical bed and walking to the window, closing the window plating to hide the sun of another day.
As he approached the bed again, he stood above her pale, still body, noticing that the purple of her hair was fading, the natural color of the roots beginning to show more obviously since it had been weeks since they’d been here long enough to die it and that was even before she’d been captured and tortured.
He didn’t even realize he was speaking out loud when he began talking to her.
“I’ve been running all my life. I ran from home. I ran again after Amelia. I moved from post to post, mission to mission, telling myself it was all duty, that it didn’t matter what I was missing. Even then, something betrayed me. And I was still running. Could I have saved my family after that coma? I don’t know. Because I didn’t even try, didn’t even check on them for months because I didn’t know how to stop ‘following orders.’ When I finally woke up, I still ran, making Bryce go with me, telling him we had to for his protection, for Mum’s. We ran to Indonesia, to Korea, Mexico where we ran some more.”
”Even after we started this team, I hid, ran from you, ran from responsibility, just hid.”
”I’m done hiding. I don’t really know what that means. But all the people I love are here, whether I have betrayed that love or not, or even if I can never tell them. But I’m going to protect them, and I’m going to rid this world of enemies. Whatever I have to do, I’m going to do it.”
“I hope I’m here when you return. I’d gladly take your pain and suffering. But I can’t. I love you more than I can really bare. But I can’t wait here any longer while the darkness gathers. I’m going to get answers and then I’m going to eliminate the threats.”
“Come back soon.”
He leaned over her still form, kissing her lips gently, then he lifted her hand from the damp spot on the bed where his tears had spilled, kissing it and then placing it lightly down by her side.
Then the soldier marched out of the room.
Last Dreams 